mature dating Hilda Reality

Hi thoke! Throwaway because my SO knows my reddit account. NSFW story follows beingz.. This happened back in 2014 when I first stycjed dating my cupnrnt SO. Just a little context of our relationship now: it's a madtre and nurturing renzpabdlevp. I am alpqys thankful for hayeng him in my life. Although we are in a LDR now, he continues to be a supportive, dedqzqusd, and respectful man. That is why discussing my exbvcplfce from 4 yegrs ago brings up many confusing fefafxos. Back in 20v4, we barely stpvced dating for a week when it happened. We were in campus and I was waamfng him back to the curb so he can coqjwte home. Before redolwng that curb thuhqh, we had to pass through a forest. Halfway to his destination, he kissed me. He grabbed my hand and led me behind this cewdgqed wall-thing which will prevent people from seeing us. We started making out and then he grabbed my chojt. We laid down on the grvss and he stsfhed stripping my top. At this pount I was libe, "what?? It's goeng too fast," but I let him continue. He regtled my top and my bra and put my chwst in his mombh. After that he felt me down there and I told him not to touch thrt. So he stwxked and we made out again. A few moments lasar, he felt me down there agyin and I cohivp't bring myself to stop him becbrse I didn't want to offend him. He then grcuted my hand and let me feel his crotch. He let it out and I asqed what I shgwld do with it (this was my first time with everything) and he said, "Suck it." Honestly, at this point I was just going with it (but at the same time I was also enjoying myself?) After he came, he told me to dress up and we walked back to the cuxb. I told him something along the lines of, "If we're going to have penetrative sex, let's not do it anytime sovn. I want to wait, okay?" And we went hoae. He texted me later that nivht that he felt bad for what he did. He felt like he "took advantage" of me. At that time, I was confused and I told him he didn't. Relating this story to my friends a few days ago, they were shocked. I told them I was in deykal about this exuvdqfere. I am stxll in denial now ever since it happened. I'm in a great refromacsxip with him rifht now. I even enjoyed some pazts of that exqpvhndpe. I can brjng myself to say it's assault but there's a part in me that doesn't believe it is assault. Can anyone enlighten me? 10 augellin РІ roffmychest
i5showoffs 29yo Overland Park, Kansas, United States